imagine getting married
after many months of planning, you’re standing at the altar with your significant other in a beautiful room filled with all of your friends and your family
and every single person in that room over age 10 knows you’re getting laid tonight
this was beautiful
my girlfriend just started a wind waker file
and she named the hero guuurl
i am dead
The last one is the best, I think. This is why I would name my (huge male Dranei) characters things like Sugarshorts. “Sugarshorts! Thank goodness you’re here!” or! or! “NOW SUGARSHORTS YOU SHALL TASTE MY WRATH”
During the Bubonic Plague, doctors wore these bird-like masks to avoid becoming sick. They would fill the beaks with spices and rose petals, so they wouldn’t have to smell the rotting bodies.
A theory during the Bubonic Plague was that the plague was caused by evil spirits. To scare the spirits away, the masks were intentionally designed to be creepy.
Mission fucking accomplished
Okay so I love this but it doesn’t cover the half of why the design is awesome and actually borders on making sense.
It wasn’t just that they didn’t want to smell the infected and dead, they thought it was crucial to protecting themselves. They had no way of knowing about what actually caused the plague, and so one of the other theories was that the smell of the infected all by itself was evil and could transmit the plague. So not only would they fill their masks with aromatic herbs and flowers, they would also burn fires in public areas, so that the smell of the smoke would “clear the air”. This all related to the miasma theory of contagion, which was one of the major theories out there until the 19th century. And it makes sense, in a way. Plague victims smelled awful, and there’s a general correlation between horrible septic smells and getting horribly sick if you’re around what causes them for too long.
You can see now that we’ve got two different theories as to what caused the plague that were worked into the design. That’s because the whole thing was an attempt by the doctors to cover as many bases as they could think of, and we’re still not done.
The glass eyepieces. They were either darkened or red, not something you generally want to have to contend with when examining patients. But the plague might be spread by eye contact via the evil eye, so best to ward that off too.
The illustration shows a doctor holding a stick. This was an examination tool, that helped the doctors keep some distance between themselves and the infected. They already had gloves on, but the extra level of separation was apparently deemed necessary. You could even take a pulse with it. Or keep people the fuck away from you, which was apparently a documented use.
Finally, the robe. It’s not just to look fancy, the cloth was waxed, as were all of the rest of their clothes. What’s one of the properties of wax? Water-based fluids aren’t absorbed by it. This was the closest you could get to a sterile, fully protecting garment back then. Because at least one person along the line was smart enough to think “Gee, I’d really rather not have the stuff coming out of those weeping sores anywhere on my person”.
So between all of these there’s a real sense that a lot of real thought was put into making sure the doctors were protected, even if they couldn’t exactly be sure from what. They worked with what information they had. And frankly, it’s a great design given what was available! You limit exposure to aspirated liquids, limit exposure to contaminated liquids already present, you limit contact with the infected. You also don’t give fleas any really good place to hop onto. That’s actually useful.
Beyond that, there were contracts the doctors would sign before they even got near a patient. They were to be under quarantine themselves, they wouldn’t treat patients without a custodian monitoring them and helping when something had to be physically contacted, and they would not treat non-plague patients for the duration. There was an actual system in place by the time the plague doctors really became a thing to make sure they didn’t infect anyone either.
These guys were the product of the scientific process at work, and the scientific process made a bitchin’ proto-hazmat suit. And containment protocols!
Some recommendations for good shows to watch during the hiatus!!! (or in general!!)
Battlestar Galactica - gritty space drama with spiritual elements!
Dead Like Me - dark dramedy about grim reapers!
The 10th Kingdom - fantasy about a girl and her dad getting sucked into grimm’s fairytales. Fun and cheesy!
Life on Mars (UK) - psychological thriller/semi-supernatural cop show!!
Being Human (UK) - a ghost, a vampire and a werewolf share an apartment!!! drama and shenanigans ensue!
Futurama - sci-fi comedy!
Clone High - animated comedy where clones of famous/historical people go to high school together!
Code Geass (anime, watch it in Japanese with subtitles for best effect) - basically V for Vendetta the anime…with mechs!!
(feel free to add your own titles to the list!)
I would also like to add Jeckyll (which is currently on netflix so get to it) if you like dark action/drama with a supernatural twist of sorts
and not only is Firefly on netflix for those who somehow haven’t seen it yet, but it’s like $10 for the whole series on dvd on amazon right now
Is that the weather report?
Everyone knows we get lesbians every goddamn year, and yet every time they arrive people act all shocked. “I’m not ready for lesbians yet! I haven’t put lesbian tyres on my car!” Lady, it happens every year. You were warned beforehand. It’s your own damn fault if you end up in an accident because you weren’t prepared for lesbians.
seriously. so tired of being late for school just because the subway can’t handle lesbians. it’s norway! what do they expect
On the bright side, learning institutions will close in their droves as nations shut down due to the overwhelming presence of lesbians.
:sigh: But you have to make up lesbian days at the end of the school year…
I’ve been waiting for lesbians ever since the weather turned cold. I was promised 5cm of lesbians and DID I GET ANY? NO I DID NOT. Oh sure, there are lesbians up on the hills, but where’s my gorgeous carpet of lesbians, huh?
Patience. Soon there’ll be enouh. And then… just think…
Lesbian angels. SO ROMANTIC.
Man. The last time we had a lesbian Christmas was when I was 8, I think. It has been FAR too long!
I fucking hate having to shovel them off the stoop so the postman can get to the box.
In my school district, you didn’t have to make up lesbian days at the end of the year when you were a senior. I really felt cheated my senior year, though, because the one day we got lesbians, they didn’t cancel school. We had a new superintendent who was from the midwest, where they of course get way more lesbians than we do out here, and she didn’t think the inch of lesbians warranted a lesbian day (obviously underestimating Seattle’s inability to drive in the lesbians). We were PISSED.
Try growing up on an island. The air is so moist that it’s pretty much impossible to get lesbians. Apparently you have to have very specific humidity levels to get a good coat of lesbians.
I still remember seeing 4ft of lesbians in Chicago, so majestic.
my grandfather just changed his facebook photo to a timed sketch I did of Atticus Murphy from Todd and the Book of Pure Evil
grandpa is apparently a satanist guidance councilor
I don’t have the heart to explain it to him